A summary of today’s threats…. set to music!

Given the threat landscape in which we live, I personally think it’s far too dangerous to even consider switching on a computer, let alone using it to surf the web. Whilst I’m finishing up reading my copy of “Luddite Hermitry for Dummies”, I present a little ditty sung to the tune of “Money for Nothing” by Dire Straits:

Now look at them blackhats that’s the way you do it
Finding holes in your security
That ain’t workin’ that’s the way you do it
Mutating malware very frequently

Now that ain’t workin’ that’s the way you do it
Lemme tell ya them guys ain’t dumb
Maybe get a virus on your little palmtop
Maybe get a virus on your phone

We gotta install fake anti virus
Custom malware deliveries
We gotta move these stolen credentials
Gotta move these identities

See the little blackhat with the Gumblar and the KoobFace
Yeah buddy, they’re his own bots
That little blackhat got his own jet airplane
That little blackhat he’s a millionaire

We gotta install hidden keyloggers
Banking trojan deliveries
We gotta move these injected iframes
‘Sploit some code that’s written in C

I shoulda learned blackhat SEO
I shoulda learned to smash the stack
Look at that pointer, she got it pointin’ anywhere you like!
Man we can have some fun
And he’s up there, what’s that? PCI audit?
Does it get you much of that “security“??
That ain’t workin’ that’s the way you do it
Get your bad press for nothin’ or redundancy

We gotta install fake porno codecs
XOR’ed shellcode deliveries
We gotta DDOS a Georgian blogger
We gotta DDOS this ISP

Now that ain’t workin’ that’s the way you do it
Infecting websites via FTP
That ain’t workin’ that’s the way you do it
Pagerank for nothin’ and your clicks for free


Alec Waters is responsible for all things security at Dataline Software, and can be emailed at alec.waters(at)dataline.co.uk

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11 Responses to “A summary of today’s threats…. set to music!”

  1. This exudes pure awesomeness!!! Reposted/linked to blog.

  2. Please somebody sing it and set to music!!!!!

  3. Joss Wickson Says:

    Simply brilliant Alec!

  4. 🙂 & I thought you were a WHO fan – Have to be “Don’t get hacked again” next.

    Ax

  5. Alec, you have way too much time on your hands! But I’m looking forward to the next one 🙂

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